ikarit: (haruhi/ yummy)
( Aug. 14th, 2006 11:16 am)
Dad has narrowed our next-year-vacation down to Cancun or Curaçao. Probably. I'm leaning towards Cancun, because one of the three resorts he's considering has free visits to Mayan ruins! Every day! He said he figured I'd go for that one, and it's the one he's leaning towards too. I'm keeping my fingers crossed, but really, anywhere would be awesome.

I'm still taking walks every day, though since I've finally, finally got my sleep schedule under control, I've changed to taking walks in the morning rather than in the evening. I can do that now since I'm actually awake in the mornings! I'm also vaguely-kinda-sorta on a diet, assuming diet is being used incredibly loosely. This is because our grocery store is remodeling and Mom can't find the snack cakes anymore. She can, however, find the fruits and vegetables, so my only real options for snacks are things like bananas and cherries. Despite all this, I appear to have actually gained two pounds. Hm. I'm not all that worried about it, because it's not the weight that matters, it's the inches. Unfortunately I haven't lost any of those, but at least I haven't gained any!

Other than exercising and eating vaguely healthy, I've been in contact with the college, and I've both changed my major and scheduled my classes. I've got to take an accounting class, ugh. I also talked to some people in the Learning Center about my wrists. I have to have my doctor fill out a disabilities form and then they can work out what I'm going to need done. Definitely someone will have to take notes for me; I can type for an hour or so without too much pain, but writing is almost instantaneously excruciating. I guess because typing uses fingers more than wrists, and vice versa for writing. I'll be able to take quizzes and tests as long as they're just multiple choice or fill-in-the-blank, but I'll have to take any essay tests in the Learning Center with a scribe. It'll be incredibly frustrating, but I don't have a choice. Even if I could work through the pain, I still can't write fast enough to finish within time.

I also need two keyboarding classes for my major (which by the way, is Medical Administrative Assistant), but the one I needed for this quarter is full. Instead of waiting, I mentioned that I'm a good typist and my advisor gave me a name and a number to call to ask about testing out. It'll be a better option in several ways, but it costs $50 just to take the test, so I'm going to have to get an idea of how likely it is that I'll pass. I'm not sure how keyboarding is graded, but I do type "properly." I was up to 70 wpm in my ninth grade keyboarding class, and I'm a whole lot faster now than I was then. I'd say at least 100 wpm, but I've never timed myself so I could be way off. Maybe I should check on that... (ETA: 90 wpm with 90-100% accuracy without splints.)

I need to call about testing out today, and I also need to head over to the eye doctor to have my glasses adjusted. I mentioned a few weeks ago that my left eye was bothering me and I was wearing my glasses more, but it's been a few months and my eye hasn't gotten any better. At this point, I'm wearing glasses more than contacts and I hate wearing glasses. I'm going to talk to my regular doctor about my dry eyes to see what he says, and then assuming he can't do anything, I'll make an appointment with the eye doctor. But about my glasses, I've been really annoyed because while they fit, they don't sit on my nose the way I like and so I'm constantly straining my eyes. I haven't had eye strain this bad in years. I'm not sure if it's that they're not sitting the way I like them, or I'm not used to wearing glasses, but I definitely need to have something done about my eyes. Even if I get the frames adjusted and get used to wearing them, I look just awful wearing them!
Someone should really, really inform authors that "nether regions" is a term that should never be used. Ever. There should be some kind of public service announcement. I see it once in a while and it makes me laugh out loud every time.

Thank god, usually it's not in smut fics. Smut authors generally use better terms than that, even if they are usually just as hysterically funny. Also speaking of smut authors, I've been coming across a rash of smut fics where the author uses "c*ck" instead of "cock." How is that any better? I'm not being rhetorical, I'd seriously like to know.

Segueing onto a completely different topic, it seems that having my little breakdown the other day was what I needed to kick my ass into gear. I've decided that I am going to Rhodes State this fall and I've picked a major. I've got to go to the Office of Admissions on Monday to deal with a few things, and I think I'll actually do it.

I also might reschedule that doctor's appointment I've put off since, oh, early June. My wrists are really bad again, and I'm worried how difficult it will be for me to take notes in class. Typing isn't too bad because the splints help, but that doesn't work with writing. My wrists cramp up after five or ten minutes when I'm writing normally. The speed at which I'd need to write notes would be absolutely impossible, and that will be a huge problem.

But I am really excited about school (well, kind of) and also because my dad told me about our vacation plans for next summer! After he and Mom went to Florida in the spring, he decided that our family needed one last family trip before... well, I guess before Brian and I move out? He wants a last hurrah, I guess. Anyway, for the first time in our lives, it's going to be a major trip. He's not sure where we're going yet, but so far he's tossed out Jamaica, the Virgin Islands and the Bahamas as ideas.

My new goal in life is to lose enough weight to look good in a bikini by next June. And maybe to get tan. And probably have long hair, but I'm only including that because I've wanted long hair since I got it cut short. In 2004, don't ask why I haven't tried to grow it out because it's a long story. If you can't tell, I'm a little bit hyper. I can't help it, I'm excited! I've never flown in a plane, I've never been out of the country, and I haven't been to the ocean since I was about twelve years old. I'm gonna be fixing all three things at once. *glee*
Nearly three years after my first and only pap smear, my doctor finally wore me down enough to get me to have a second one. It was supposed to be on Tuesday, but I missed the appointment because I was still sick. It was rescheduled for earlier this morning.

Suddenly, I think that I never want to have sex. Ever. Unless there's some sort of anesthetic involved, because ohshitOW.

Also, I'm never having another pap smear until after I've had sex, which I'm quite determined will be the other side of never.
I promised [livejournal.com profile] mynuet that if I woke up today and my face still felt funny, I would go to the doctor. It doesn't, so I'm not going to go. I still have a doctor's appointment a week from Monday, so I'll be waiting until then.

I was curious, though, about what could be causing so much neck pain. So I googled it! And while I still have no idea what might be causing it--the onset seems to fit with muscle strain, but not for this length of time--I also saw something about diagnosing herniated disks that's really confusing me.

See, I read this article that says it's impossible to diagnose a herniated disk from only an x-ray, and when I went to the neurologist about the pain over the summer, he thought I might have a herniated disk. And to diagnose this, he made me get x-rays. Only x-rays. Now that seems a bit wrong to me... they said the x-rays came back normal, and I never thought I had a herniated disk in the first place, but now I feel that I made the correct decision not to go back to that neurologist.

Unless, of course, the article I read was incorrect, in which case I still don't really feel like I should've gone back to see the neurologist again. I didn't like him very much.

I just don't know. All morning and afternoon, my neck felt just fine. Now since I've started this post and gotten all frustrated, it's hurting again. And going into my face again! But now I'm definitely sure that it's not numbness. It's more like really tight muscles, or tiny muscle spasms. I'm guessing from the stress. *sigh* I can't wait to see the doctor about this. Just as long as he doesn't make me go back to that neurologist...
ikarit: (star wars/ love can ignite the stars)
( Oct. 29th, 2005 11:25 am)
Well, I'm just back from the chiropractor, and while I've got that "just had my bones moved into different placements" ache, I'm absolutely thrilled! My neck, which was the main source of my pain, is much better! Way better than I'd hoped for! This Dr. Wheeler dude who I saw today is my new hero. The problem was that the vertebra causing the pain was really high up (C1, I think he said, whatever that means--he said it was the first one). The chiropractor (the hot doc!) I saw over the summer didn't manage to help at all, but this guy really did. For the first time since I woke up with this pain, like back in April or something, I am without severe pain in my neck.

He said that the pain will come right back unless I start "treating it aggressively," because the muscles in the neck are attached to the vertebrae, and they have a kind of "memory" and adjusting them aggravates them, and they'll pull the vertebra right back where it was before. (Something like that, I don't really know a lot about that kind of thing, and my memory is usually suspect.) He said that I'd need to come back several times a week for the next month to fix it completely. Unfortunately, I can't really do that because I'm away at school most of the time. I did make an appointment for two weeks, when I'm coming back again. I'll just keep doing that until I'm home for Christmas, and then I really will "treat it aggressively" for all of Christmas vacation. That'll have to do.

He also said that the increased dizzy spells are probably because of my neck, which I'd already kind of assumed. So that's double the reason not to just live with the pain--dizzy spells actively interfere with my everyday life. Just yesterday, driving home from school, I got a dizzy spell on 475 around Toledo because it was really busy and I was stressed by the traffic. For a minute, until I forced myself to take deep, rhythmic breaths, I was afraid I'd have to pull over so I wouldn't faint. In the middle of busy traffic in the middle of a large city! That's not really an optimal situation to have a dizzy spell, that's for sure. I don't even think I could've pulled over in time, it was that busy, and honestly, there were barriers on both sides, so there wasn't even anywhere to really pull over!

In conclusion, I definitely approve of this Dr. Wheeler, that's for sure. I made my next appointment with him!
The eye check-up went very well. My eyes are still getting worse, but the change in prescription is smaller every time. I curse my father's recessive genes... it's all his fault. I asked the doctor how bad my eyes were. He said I was actually off their scale, but if he had to guess, he'd say something like 10/400. I have no idea what that means aside from the fact he said the 10 meant I'd have to be 10 feet away to see the big E. (Well, I definitely couldn't see it from the 15 or 20 feet in the examining room--not even a hint of black. I couldn't even tell there WAS a letter showing.)

...oh, I just looked it up. That means I can see at 10 ft what people with 20/20 vision could see at 400 ft? God, my eyes really do suck. But why do I have a 10/400 instead of 20/something? Is 10/400 equal to 20/800?

Insurance covered my contacts, but I also needed a pair of glasses that I could wear to class if I want to. My old pair is about six years old, and I wouldn't be able to see the blackboard with them. I'm vain and refuse to wear thick lenses, which makes it a bit difficult to get anything at a reasonable price. In the end, I decided to go for the thinnest lens possible, which still might be thicker than I would be happy with. The total was nearly $300, and because my insurance only covers glasses or contacts, not both, I have to pay for all of it myself. Ugh, why are glasses so expensive?
I'd forgotten about this part of hay fever. Oh, god, the itchiness. All over. This morning was the first day it was really, really noticeable. I could not stop scratching. At first I thought it was that I was all sweaty, or something about living in the dorms... hell, even that I was dirty or getting a rash or something disgusting.

But no. In French class, I sneezed and realized it was just hay fever season. Hay fever season and my doctor is an hour and a half away and I can't get there until like OCTOBER. Why me?

We have to leave the window in our room open, too, because the air conditioning doesn't work as well as we'd like. I'm fairly certain that's not going to help with the itching.

ETA: Anyone know a good over the counter anti-histamine that won't make you sleepy? I have two bottles of allergy medication on my dresser right now, but it's actually what my doctor told me to take as a sleep aid... It doesn't really work on my allergies, anyway. Not very well. It's always nasal sprays that help with the symptoms for me, nothing else does any good.
I have done what no doctor has dared to do! I have... diagnosed my syncope!

Look, I even remember the fancy word for my 'condition'. Syncope! Fainting! Don't be too shocked, because I've got more fancy words coming up. :D I will define them in parathesis afterwards because if I look back on this in a few weeks, I will have forgotten what the big words mean. Well, okay, at least hypotension.

I... have syncope... um, faint... probably for a mix of three medical reasons, with help from a certain kind of situation. Actually, I'm surprised it wasn't more obvious. ^-^; First of all, I have an arrhythmia (irregular heartbeat). It's not a problem, it runs in my family and doesn't require medication at all. Second, I'm probably hypoglycemic (low blood sugar). Thirdly, I just realized I verge on having hypotension (low blood pressure). At the doctor's office, I average something like 90/60, which is the lowest you can have and still be within the normal range.

I forget why I started looking at this--I think it had to do with my medication and a commercial on television saying that people with hypotension are chronically sleepy, which I am and so I just wondered--but when I was looking up hypotension, I saw that it can cause syncope, which made me look into that... I've always been incredibly curious about it, but I never got around to researching.

Facts, facts, I love my precious facts--also known as shamelessly copy/pasting )

And this relates to me how? )

Also, I am strangely compelled to list sources, but this is just for my own personal use, so I'm resisting the urge. Also, I already closed out most of the windows and I am not searching for them all again.

And just for laughs, a list of terms I came across that I did NOT have to look up )

It's odd how that that medical terminology I had to learn for my phlebotomy class comes in handy for the stupidest things. Um, there were other terms I didn't list because I figured they were common knowledge and thus no one would be surprised that I didn't have to look them up.

Now I have to GO TO SLEEP because I have to get up at seven in the morning and I've been half asleep since ten already. This entry took fifty-one minutes to write--it's now 1:11 in the morning. I'm sure I made a glaring mistake in it somewhere (I usually do), but I will look it over before church tomorrow.
ikarit: (sasuke/ hate you [super cute])
( Jul. 20th, 2005 03:23 pm)
I need to kill my mother, and I have to cause her an excruciating amount of pain before I do it.

When I told her I wanted to have the chiropractor appointment she'd offered to pay for, she blithely handed me the money without telling me that the new chiropractor is a very, very cute guy not too much older than me.

When I walked into the door afterwards, the phone was ringing. It was Mom calling to see if I was back yet. Her response when I raged (squeaked) incoherently about cute doctors? "Oh, yeah... hahaha... well, you wouldn't have believed me."

I am going to kill her.

So I went to the chiropractor wearing no makeup and having just blown my hair dry. I looked like crap. And gaped like a fish when he walked into the room and smiled at me. And proceeded to babble through his very nice attempts at conversation.

Oh, god. I am going to kill her.

I did, however, get my back and neck fixed, and I have an ice pack tied to my back right this second (long story). I have also decided that the second I feel a twinge of something that could be back or neck pain, I'm making another appointment and this time, putting on makeup and doing my hair.

Maybe I shouldn't kill her, because she'd be paying for all future appointments, too. Hm.
How am I supposed to take Ginger for a walk if it's raining, may I ask?! I'm trying to be good, and the weather just won't let me. *sulk*

Got up at 7:45 because I had a doctor's appointment at 8:45. I was already awake before my alarm went off, so it wasn't much of a problem... I can't believe I wake up so early. I wouldn't have gotten up if I didn't have somewhere to be, but just the fact that I wake up is startling. I'm not a morning person. At all.

Doctor put me on another medication to help with my anxiety... I'm hopeful that will work. I'm not really depressed anymore, as he pointed out, just incredibly nervous and anxious. It's hard for me to function, I'm so anxious all the time. Now I have more medical bills to pay, though it will be worth it if this new medication helps.

Lindsay called while I was waiting for the doctor to come back... she's sick, so we can't go to the gym. We can't go Monday, either, because she works in the morning and I work in the evening. I actually relieve her at 4... so that's why I want to take a walk! So I can get my exercise in today! I would've gone for a walk anyway, most likely, because I've gone on a walk for the past two days. It's just that I've never taken a walk in the morning before! And I'm all dressed to go to the gym, so it's perfect for walking! And Ginger would love me forever!

But no. It has to rain. Just brill. @_@ I have to use my new icon to cheer myself up.


[ETA: ...wait, never mind. Ahahaha. ^-^; They're right where I left them... in my jewelry box. I didn't think to check there.]

[ETA2: fifteen minutes later... Um, someone please remind me next time that just because the rain slows down and nearly stops for a while does NOT mean it's safe to go for a walk yet, because it could start up again. And it might be worse than it was before. *annoyed and wet*]
Waaaah, definitely have some kind of knee issues. I went to the gym with Lindsay for the first time in over a week today (various reasons for that--actually, I can say with all honesty that it's all Lindsay's fault~!), and when I got on the stationary bike, it started to hurt almost straight away. Hm... I wonder what it is.

For a while after I got off the bike, I worried I'd be limping for a while. At first, my legs were all jiggly and felt like jelly, so I couldn't feel anything, but when I was standing around waiting for Lindsay to finish using the Nautilus machines (I'm not doing those until see a chiropractor about my neck), it really started to hurt. But it went away, and now it's fine. I hope it doesn't do that again... it's never done it before. I probably just twisted it when I started pedaling on the stationary bike or something.

I really need to schedule an appointment with my doctor to talk about my recent spats of depression, and my wrist pain, and just to let him know I've been fainting. He knew I'd fainted before, but he doesn't know that I've fainted twice so far this year (and considering there were five to ten years between my first and my second spells, and at least seven years between my second and third, I think it's something I should mention). I think it might be because I'm hypoglycemic, but the last time I talked to him about that, he said that to test for hypoglycemia, you have to test while you're feeling lightheaded from not eating or whatever.

Now I know about fasting blood sugars, and I want to know why that test won't work. @_@ Why won't it? I suppose it doesn't matter, like he said... even if I'm hypoglycemic, it's still the same situation. I need to stop forgetting to eat. That's probably the real reason I've had two fainting spells this year... I'm eating a lot less than I used to, and sometimes actually forgetting meals--until recently, an unheard of situation for me. No real reason for this, it's just that I'm not so hungry these days. Still, I want to mention it to him just so he knows, and I would like to know for sure whether I am hypoglycemic or not.

Unfortunately, I just took my last Wellbutrin, so I either need to get more samples from him, or have them call in a prescription to a pharmacy. If they have to call in a prescription, I cannot really afford to go to the doctor's office too... medication is expensive. So when they call back about that, if they have samples, I'll make a doctor's appointment and if they don't, I'll wait a few weeks. Hopefully I will be fine until then! It's nothing major, anyway, just having trouble dealing with stress.

I want to take Ginger for a walk, but I'm so lazy. *whimper*

Hey! Mom just came home, yay! For lunch. She brought strawberries, too... she says they're "extra flavorful" because they're home grown. She's very excited. Really, they look kind of deformed for strawberries, and not at all appetizing.
Ah, I seem to have gotten myself all worked up over something again. I hate when I do this... me and my medical issues! I went to the neurologist a while back, I think I mentioned that. I don't think I mentioned that he requested I get an x-ray for my neck. I don't think I've, at any point in the past few months, mentioned the problems that led to his deciding it necessitated an x-ray (just to check). Did I mention it? I usually ignore things like this until it's impossible to ignore, but maybe I mentioned it and then forgot... it's possible.

It's nothing really, I just woke up a few months ago with a pain in the left side of my neck like a pinched nerve, and also what feels like just under my left shoulder blade, to the inside. It hasn't gone away, and just lately since the neurologist appointment, it's gotten much worse. It hurts all the time so I can barely stand it and I even take painkillers--something I usually never, ever do. I've been getting funny dizzy spells, and my whole body feels really weak. I used to get dizzy a lot when I was younger--lightheaded, actually, is what I called it--but it went away a few years ago. And just now, my arms feel sort of numb and weak.

The doctor asked me about that... weakness in my body. It might have been going on all along and I never noticed. It's silly, but I never notice things like that at all unless it's really major. Well, I notice them sometimes, I'm sure, but I don't take note of them. So if I really feel some sort of weakness, I can't recall and told the doctor that I never had.

Anyway, he wanted me to get an x-ray to take a look at it. I don't know all the possibilities or anything, but the only thing he said was bulging disk. I looked it up, and the symptoms I described do fit that, but I don't know.

So now I've gotten myself all worked up and I'm shaky and kind of scared and I feel really silly. Is a bulging disk even something so bad? I don't think so at all, but one (well... the only one, but sure there must be more?) of the treatments listed was surgery, and I don't have insurance, and...

I'm being silly anyway. I always make such a fuss over things and nothing ever comes of them. I'm having one of those weird funny-feeling dizzy spells, so that's probably what has me all worked up. I'll call about making the x-ray appointment tomorrow, anyway. Best get it over with so I can stop freaking myself out!

...um... I can't feel my left ear very much, I think...
ikarit: (sakura/ defeat)
( Jun. 7th, 2005 02:46 pm)
WHY do I listen to my doctor? When he wanted me to go to the neurologist to have him check up on my headaches, I was all for it, but now that I've went and gotten medication for my headaches, I'm not so happy.

I'm having a really bad reaction to the stuff the neurologist gave me. I feel... heavy, and clumsy, and I'm so nauseous... and even though I was supposed to take it when I felt a headache coming on, to help with the headache... it actually seems to have made it worse, and my neck is killing me too.

Can't walk, can't move, and I'm fighting the urge to throw up as I type this because it's wayyy too much movement than my body wants to be doing.

God, am so sick. *fighting the urge to gag and puke and ohgodohgodohgod*

It hurts. Make it stop.

I'm crying now.

I am never touching this... "Zomig" stuff again.